THE SUPER BOWL SHUFFLES YOU DOWN MEMORY LANE

January, 1986, Chicago

What’s happening with the Super Bowl when you watch it? I’m first writing this post for Super Bowl 52. Pats v Eagles was then, what’s now? I wonder if I do meta editing in the future and it’s like I’m talking to myself?

Yeah, you do. Of course you did. Do, did … I should pick a tense and stick with it! This year it’s a change as the Eagles are out and Rams are in. Patriots are still in because of course they are. Back to the original text.

Weird. I’m writing this on a Saturday, watching random UFC shit, with a life as boring as you’d expect, but, one day, this might be me reflecting on that time in my life. I’ll be in my 50s, this site will have been running for 20 years, and I’ll have kept up this same gimmick of re-posting this.

If that’s the case, I should make the special, shouldn’t I? This is almost a time capsule of my life. Instead: nothing.

2018: When I write this, I’m 34. I don’t like my job. I love my dog. I’d like to be better. I’ll add to this in one year.

2019: I’m 35. Same shitty job. Still love my dog. My life is entirely the same as last year at this time and that’s not good, is it? See you in a year.

2020: Super Bowl 54 now. Brady has fallen and the man drafted as his replacement, Jimmy G. has risen in his place, leading his 49ers to the summit, squaring off with the kid with the hair who will probably be the next Kobe Bryant in America (Kobe just died). Three years in a row I’ve milked this post; many happy returns.

2021: Lol at last year and my “Brady has fallen” line from last year. What an idiot. He’s the GOAT.

2022: Brady is now gone forever, we can be assured of this. Los Angeles doesn’t deserve a team or such a nice stadium. I still don’t like my job, mostly because I feel like I’m in a lower social caste. Status is too important in my life.

2023: Brady came back but now says he’s for sure gone – he lost his billionaire supermodel wife to play one last season. This entire thing became about Tom Brady, somehow. I just turned 40.

2024: I turned 41 today. Brady is officially out of the news as the only thing that matters now in sports is Taylor Swift. This is an absolute fact and in ten years, someone will read this and think, “Really?” Yes, really.

2025: I turn 42 in two days. She’s still in the news and still one of the main stories in the lead up to the game. Brady owns part of the Raiders now. Btw, to the me of 2018, who was 34 and hated his job and all that: we did it, we made it, things are good now. I love my job. I make good money (for once). We have a dog that we adopted from our wife (I mean, it’s her dog but I take care of her a lot). I like that I’m using a singular plural.

The Super Bowl Shuffle from The Greatest Team Ever

Super Bowl Shuffle Lyrics

Chorus
We are the Bears Shufflin’ Crew
Shufflin’ on down, doin’ it for you
We’re so bad we know we’re good
Blowin’ your mind like we knew we would
You know we’re just struttin’ for fun
Struttin’ our stuff for everyone
We’re not here to start no trouble
We’re just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle

Walter Payton
Well, they call me Sweetness
And I like to dance
Runnin’ the ball is like makin’ romance
We’ve had the goal since training camp
To give Chicago a Super Bowl chance
And we’re not doin’ this
Because we’re greedy
The Bears are doin’ it to feed the needy
We didn’t come here to look for trouble
We just came here to do
The Super Bowl Shuffle

Willie Gault
This is Speedy Willie, and I’m world class
I like runnin’ but I love to get the pass
I practice all day and dance all night
I got to get ready for the Sunday fight
Now I’m as smooth as a chocolate swirl
I dance a little funky, so watch me girl
There’s not one here that does it like me
My Super Bowl Shuffle will set you free

Mike Singletary
I’m Samurai Mike, I stop ’em cold
Part of the defense, big and bold
I’ve been jammin’ for quite a while
Doin’ what’s right and settin’ the style
Give me a chance, I’ll rock you good
Nobody messin’ in my neighborhood
I didn’t come here lookin’ for trouble
I just came to do The Super Bowl Shuffle

Chorus
We are the Bears Shufflin’ Crew
Shufflin’ on down, doin’ it for you
We’re so bad we know we’re good
Blowin’ your mind like we knew we would
You know we’re just struttin’ for fun
Struttin’ our stuff for everyone
We’re not here to start no trouble
We’re just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle

Jim McMahon
I’m the punky QB, known as McMahon
When I hit the turf, I’ve got no plan
I just throw my body all over the field
I can’t dance, but I can throw the pill
I motivate the cats, I like to tease
I play so cool, I aim to please
That’s why you all got here on the double
To catch me doin’ the Super Bowl Shuffle

Otis Wilson
I’m mama’s boy Otis, one of a kind
The ladies all love me
For my body and my mind
I’m slick on the floor as I can be
But ain’t no sucker gonna get past me
Some guys are jealous
Of my style and class
That’s why some end up on their –
I didn’t come here lookin’ for trouble
I just get down to The Super Bowl Shuffle

Steve Fuller
They say Jimbo is our man
If Jimmy can’t do it, I sure can
This is Steve, and it’s no wonder
I run like lightnin’, pass like thunder
So bring on Atlanta, bring on Dallas
This is for Mike and Papa Bear Halas
I’m not here to feather his ruffle
I just came here to do
The Super Bowl Shuffle

Mike Richardson
I’m L.A. Mike, and I play it cool
They don’t sneak by me ’cause I’m no fool
I fly on the field and get on down
Everybody knows I don’t mess around
I can break ’em, shake ’em
Any time of day
I like to steal it and make ’em pay
So please don’t cry to beat my hustle
‘Cause I’m just here to do
The Super Bowl Shuffle

Chorus
We are the Bears Shufflin’ Crew
Shufflin’ on down, doin’ it for you
We’re so bad we know we’re good
Blowin’ your mind like we knew we would
You know we’re just struttin’ for fun
Struttin’ our stuff for everyone
We’re not here to start no trouble
We’re just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle

Richard Dent
The sackman’s comin’, I’m your man Dent
If the quarterback’s slow
He’s gonna get bent
We stop the run, we stop the pass
I like to dump guys on their –
We love to play for the world’s best fans
You better start makin’
Your Super Bowl plans
But don’t get ready or go to any trouble
Unless you practice
The Super Bowl Shuffle

Gary Fencik
It’s Gary here, and I’m Mr. Clean
They call me “hit man”
Don’t know what they mean
They throw it long and watch me run
I’m on my man, one-on-one
Buddy’s guys cover it down to the bone
That’s why they call us the 46 zone
Come on everybody let’s scream and yell
We’re goin’ to do the Shuffle
Then ring your bell

William “Refrigerator” Perry
You’re lookin’ at the Fridge
I’m the rookie
I may be large, but I’m no dumb cookie
You’ve seen me hit, you’ve seen me run
When I get the pass, we’ll have more fun
I can dance, you will see
The others, they all learn from me
I don’t come here lookin’ for trouble
I just came here to do
The Super Bowl Shuffle

Chorus
We are the Bears Shufflin’ Crew
Shufflin’ on down, doin’ it for you
We’re so bad we know we’re good
Blowin’ your mind like we knew we would
You know we’re just struttin’ for fun
Struttin’ our stuff for everyone
We’re not here to start no trouble
We’re just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle

CELEBRATE THE 1985 BEARS SUPER BOWL SHUFFLE