As I sat enjoying the action, cage side at UFC 201, I opened my browser to my online gambling account to check out my bets. I had put together a monster 7 fight parlay. I was examining my bet ticket… Masvidal (winner), Krylov (winner), Benoit (winner), Perez (winner)… I thought, “Four wins in a row and I’m looking good. Only 3 more fights AND I’ve got ALL the favorites! This 25-dollar bet is going to pay out about 700 bucks. This trip may pay for itself… I’ve got Brown, Namajunas, and Lawler!”
I think you know what happened next…
First, Matt Brown gets clocked in the opening minute. I panic. “Fucking MATT BROWN is going to kill my parlay! Wait, wait… he’s back on his feet!” Then sure enough, his liver explodes after a devastating kick by Ellenberger. There goes my winnings. “GODDAM IT!” Of all people to win. Jake “Mr. Disappointment” Ellenberger decides to fight.
Next, Karolina Kowalkiewicz wins a hellacious striking battle with Rose Namajunas. I figured Rose would have taken her down and attempted a submission. Wrong.
Finally, Tyron Woodley FINISHES the unfinishable Robbie Lawler in 2 minutes and 12 seconds.
It was a crazy night. There were five decisions, and all were close. Hell, one was a MAJORITY DRAW! Judges were actually giving 10-8 rounds. Shocking. There was one submission, which was a rear-naked-choke, and FIVE knock outs! Two of the KO’s resulted in the unconscious man being literally out for a looooooong time. Grabowski didn’t even get onto his stool until AFTER Rogan was done interviewing. Check him for CTE’s.
Summary: All told, it was an eventful and enjoyable evening. My only criticism of UFC is the length of the show. I long for the days of yore where UFC did not have to air everything on FS1. This show lasted from 7pm until 12:30 am and there were only 11 fights! Usually shows are 12 or 13 fights. I got back to my hotel well after 1 am eastern and I didn’t even bother to attend the press conference. THE SHOWS ARE TOO LONG!
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UFC, listen up. Here are some suggestions that will undoubtedly make your product better:
- 10 fights max on a card. No one wants to do ANYTHING for 5 plus hours. Cap your shows at 4 hours total.
- No one can take a fight within 2 weeks of the event. If someone has to pull out, then the fight is scrapped. Guys are taking fights with dangerously little time to prepare.
- Slot fights for every 20 min, not 30. It’s too slow, especially after a quick KO.
- Put more matches on Fight Pass and run through them faster.
- TURN DOWN THE FUCKING HOUSE MUSIC! In between fights, it’s unnecessary to take an ear-beating. We are not in a fucking club, and the adults would like to speak to each other without having to scream and spit in each others faces.