Why in the bloody fuck did we like this song? It’s terrible… Lyrics to follow:
I took her out, it was a Friday night
I wore cologne to get the feeling right
We started making out and she took off my pants
But then I turned on the TV
And that’s about the time she walked away from me
And that’s about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you’re 23
And are still more amused by TV shows
What the Hell is ADD?
My friends say I should act my age
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?
Then later on, on the drive home
I called her mom, from a pay phone
I said I was the cop and your husband’s in jail
This state looks down on sodomy
And that’s about the time that bitch hung up on me
Nobody likes you when you’re 23
And are still more amused by prank phone calls
What the Hell is call ID?
My friends say I should act my age
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?
And that’s about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you’re 23
And you still act like you’re in freshman year
What the hell is wrong with me?
My friends say I should act my age
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?
That’s about the time that she broke up with me
No one should take themselves so seriously
With many years ahead to fall in line
Why would you wish that on me?
I never want to act my age
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?
@ComedySuplex #BlinkSucks
What was my brain thinking by enjoying this shit in 1999? The album was Blink 182’s cleverly titled “Enema of the State.” A toilet joke in the title. It’s a joke. I get jokes. I get that marketing to 14 year old boys is a viable money making plan, but I was 20. What’s my excuse again?
The song is really catchy but did you read the lyrics? It’s not even Doctor Seuss worthy. Let’s take a closer look at what message Blink was trying to convey.
It starts as a story, seemingly from the first person’s perspective, that person being most likely a teenage male. So our hero is on a date and about to get an HJ or a BJ, or some sort of J, and then he turns on the TV so the chick gets mad and leaves… HAS THIS EVER HAPPENED IN THE HISTORY OF YOUNG MEN HOOKING UP WITH YOUNG WOMEN? FUCK NO! “Nah, baby, I know you’re about to squat on my pole, but I’d rather see what’s cracking on MTV. Maybe that delightful sock puppet show, Sifl and Olly, is on…” Never happened. No young adult male has ever been more interested in TV than getting his dick wet. Never.
Your friends say you should act your age, but this is less about age and more about being a retard. I get it, if your wife wants to give you a tugger and you’re watching Monday Night Raw and you tell her to come back after the Sasha Banks match so that you’re already in the “leather” phase, but from ages “first ejaculation” to “death,” males are mostly about achieving orgasms. So unless the hero of this song is 11, or gay, and doesn’t have the physical capacity to make his dude head shoot a snot rocket, it’s retarded.
Now we have the second verse… Later on, he’s driving home, I’m assuming he means he’s driving the girl home who he wouldn’t let touch his D. So he decides to stop and use a pay phone to prank the girl’s mother, because he’s an asshole. The lie he goes with is that he’s the police, and that the mom’s husband is in jail for being gay. Maybe he was pitching, maybe he was catching, we don’t know. The fact remains, the mom didn’t buy the story. And why would she? Some pimply voiced teen calls her and in his best baritone cleverly makes a quip that “the state looks down on sodomy.” As if this is how you’d actually receive a horrific message from the police if it were true. “Ma’am, your husband is in jail. Ya see, here in Mississippi, we’re not big fans of moonshiners…” Right. I’m sure some super low ranking officer tasked with telling people horrible news makes an effort to sarcastically condescend the guilty party.
More importantly, WHY DID HE BOTHER TO MAKE THIS CALL!? My first thought was that maybe he was trying to get the mom to leave the house and go find the dad in jail so that our hero could take his girl to pound town while she was out, but we already know that he’s not interested in any poonanny. Then the chick he’s driving home breaks up with him, and he’s mad about it… WHAT DID HE EXPECT? “No, I don’t want to fuck you. And your mom is a cunt. Let’s get married.” She dumped him. No duh!
These lyrics are such garbage. Is the message that teenage boys are retards? Got it. If that’s the point, well then Blink, you could have picked a more logical topic. Just talk about them being obnoxious bullies, but not wanting available pussy is not realistic at all. Fuck you Blink 182. You’re not musical geniuses. You’re fucking hacks. I’m really impressed by your nakedness. Fuck you.
@ComedySuplex #BlinkSucks
