Ronda Rousey on SNL was terrible. She was so terrible that it was more painful than fighting a prime Wanderlei Silva. It was worse than any joke I’ll make in this piece and was worse than the horrible Conor McGregor joke I made earlier today.
I figure it’s one of those “too cool for school” things to say that I don’t regularly watch SNL but I don’t. Ever. Last night was the first full episode I’ve watched in forever, and so in that sense Rousey’s appearance accomplished its goal. However, secondary to the ratings she might have drawn was her being funny.
She was not.
No one was in fairness. I don’t think I laughed at one single thing on the entire show. Her opening monologue was something involving her acknowledging that she got punched a lot by Holly Holm. Then the chick who will be part of the awful Ghostbusters remake did this impression of Justin Bieber and Ronda punched him/her. Holy fuck was it awful. Is that the best they do? The impression was simply not funny. Maybe it was spot on, I don’t know really, but it sure as shit wasn’t funny.
Oh, and what happened to Weekend Update? How can you not be funny with that? Even Jay Leno was funny just riffing on the news of the day/week. These guys were making jokes and would sit for an applause that was polite, at best. I’d have felt bad except that they were so not-funny that I began feeling a sense of dislike for them simply because they weren’t funny. And thus I wanted them to cry.
There was one skit where I think Ronda’s entire role was to literally – literally – sit there and say like two words as people “acted” around her. Nothing she did was memorable or in any way positive or negative: it simply existed for a moment and then disappeared like a dandelion in a hurricane.
Which isn’t a good thing because Ronda needed image rehab and this wasn’t it. Again, it didn’t hurt her or anything, but after it was over all I could think was, “Holy mother of sin, how on earth can she be in The Pictures?” (Oh, right, I’ve also never seen her act except for in commercials for the Entourage movie. I assume she’s awful in those too.)
Worse than anything she did though was this article. I was searching for video of her monologue, because I know it’s out there, when I saw a review by Hollywood Life. In said review they wrote, with presumably a straight face:
Ronda Rousey, 28, took over Saturday Night Live on Jan. 23. The UFC star showed up dressed to impress and had her comedic wits about her. Not to mention she shocked the audience by apologizing to Holly Holm. Is there anything she can’t do?
They then say:
Yes, as we had hoped there was a huge diss to Justin Bieber. At one point Ronda says he isn’t relevant anymore and then proceeds to slap the actress (Kate McKinnon) portraying Justin. It was sensational.
I’m sure I’ve missed something but why were people hoping for a diss to Bieber? Did he make fun of her after she lost? And what’s with making a big deal out of her congratulating Holm? Wait a few months and then briefly say “congrats” to someone who you publicly chided, insulted, and then got your ass handed to by? If anything, I think that makes her look worse.
Maybe Rousey is better in movies, with all the takes and a director coaching her and so on. I mean, I doubt it, but maybe. Because if not, then she’s doomed because Holm has her number and she sure as hell isn’t funny. Or at least she wasn’t on SNL.
Oh, and here’s said opening. You’ve been warned…
Update: guess this was taken down. Maybe her manager finally watched it.